Blackmail

Lunch With Jenny

Photo by Jenny

I recently broke up with Facebook because I needed a break from the declining positivity. I may get back together with it again in the future, but for now we need some time apart. I shared this news with my close friends — some took it better than others. My friend Jenny was particularly unhappy. I met her for lunch today and as I was sitting down, she took a surprise picture of me paparazzi-style. She knows my weaknesses — news about friends, not liking photos of myself posted that I can’t see, and celebrity gossip. After our lunch meeting Jenny sent me the photo posted above and the following email …

“this photo will be uploaded as of Friday, June 14 9AM EST if you are NOT back on FB. Also, i plan to post a series of titillating news stories that i know you will want to see and email you short teasers…

and remember that you now look extremely guilty — as you just happened to shut down your FB right when all the government spying has come to light…”

I almost fell off my chair from laughing. I’m going to try to stay strong and keep off of Facebook for a while, but I have a feeling her creative efforts to lure me back will be my Kryptonite.